Worse than the Disease

Posts : 1078 Join date : 2008-08-21

Mallus wrote:: "We are graced with the presence of an immortal and a visitor from the realms of fancy and you want to conduct martial exercises? While we missed your tactical acumen and restorative advice Mr. Artichoke, we surely didn't miss your insistence on doing uninteresting things."

Yatagan takes a deep breath, so as to speak his next words even louder.

"Tonight is a night for living! For wine, song and fireworks! Let us show our new friends the Port. With our luck someone will stick us with the butcher's bill before the last round is bought."

Artichoke sighs softly. Some things clearly never change. But then he smiles and says, "Very well. You've clearly all been doing fine - well, other than poor L - in my absence, so it seems your ... training methods have some merit to them. I just wanted to ensure, with the strange mission we have for tomorrow, that you don't end up in a difficult situation due to lack of preparedness. Such as," he adds with just a bit of smugness, "The one I ... er, Christabel and I found you in when we arrived at the arena."

"But, as you suggested, let's just relax and have a night on the town tonight. I'll consider it a bonding exercise." And with the way you do things, chances are someone else will try to kill us.

Posts : 242 Join date : 2009-02-04

"I could certainly go for a beer."

Posts : 900 Join date : 2008-08-22

Mallus wrote:: "Tonight is a night for living! For wine, song and fireworks! Let us show our new friends the Port. With our luck someone will stick us with the butcher's bill before the last round is bought."

"Excellent!" says Odanais, slapping Yatagan on the back. "Let's get to the boozing and you can tell me about these religions I've invented? What's the angle exactly? Do they bring in much coin?"

Posts : 1428 Join date : 2008-08-22

shilsen wrote:: - well, other than poor L -

"We shall set off an explosive in memory of him" Yatagan says solemnly.

Quote :: "I just wanted to ensure, with the strange mission we have for tomorrow, that you don't end up in a difficult situation due to lack of preparedness. Such as," he adds with just a bit of smugness, "The one I ... er, Christabel and I found you in when we arrived at the arena."

"How can you say we weren't prepared? We had faith, and the gods delivered you in our moment of need, right on schedule."

overeddie wrote:: "I could certainly go for a beer."

"I've got the first round, comrade! Let's be off!"

Posts : 1428 Join date : 2008-08-22

gridley wrote:: Do they bring in much coin?"

"Directly, no. The Cult of the Miracle Pig tracks best in the poorer quarters of the Port, but she's gained a much wider exposure of late" says Yatagan, channeling a marketing textbook from the World Before he mistook for an epic poem.

"But our fortunes have surely changed for the better since we rescued Her. We gained and spent huge sums of money and now attire oursevles as warrior princes of old."

Posts : 242 Join date : 2009-02-04

Mallus wrote:: "I've got the first round, comrade! Let's be off!"

"Finally, and perhaps your god can flip for the second round as well!"

Posts : 1428 Join date : 2008-08-22

overeddie wrote:: "Finally, and perhaps your god can flip for the second round as well!"

"If the first one can't, I'll hit up the second!" says Yatagan, already in high spirits.

Posts : 174 Join date : 2008-08-27

Christabel ignores Odanais comment, and continues to listen to the adventurers talk amongst themselves. It doesn't take long for her blank expression to turn into a frown.

Quote :: "How can you say we weren't prepared? We had faith, and the gods delivered you in our moment of need, right on schedule."

Crossing her arms, the deva huffs. "Faith guided us to you... I guess. But it still took our talents," she pauses to gesture at Artichoke and herself, "to defeat the bad guys. And our abilities aren't gifts from a divinity."

Posts : 1428 Join date : 2008-08-22

Penelope wrote:: "Faith guided us to you... I guess.

"Surely it did. Thus our prayers uttered before the mayhem constituted a form of preparation, whose efficacy was born out by you showing up and us not being killed" says Yatagan happily.

"Past events make airtight arguments, do they not?"

Quote :: But it still took our talents," she pauses to gesture at Artichoke and herself, "to defeat the bad guys.

"And for those talents we are powerfully grateful."

Quote :: And our abilities aren't gifts from a divinity."

"Really? Mine are."

Posts : 174 Join date : 2008-08-27

Quote :: "Really? Mine are."

"Of course!" she exclaims, "you're a paladin, aren't you? But us - Artichoke and I, that is - aren't connected to your pig or box deities. Some of your other comrades, I'm sure, are not devoted to them either."

Christabel then shrugs. "Don't take this the wrong way, but I think you need to be a little more... critical regarding this faith business. Some god may have guided us to your location, but you can't know nor fathom why. To think it was for your protection, or so that you could benefit the state on the behalf of a deity, is more than a little egotistical."

Posts : 1428 Join date : 2008-08-22

Penelope wrote:: "Of course!" she exclaims, "you're a paladin, aren't you?

"Indeed. Primarily of the Dragon Within, RAWR! Be Upon Him.

Quote :: Some of your other comrades, I'm sure, are not devoted to them either."

"True. Mr. Jumps-Off-Mountains worships the Dog. Asarlai compacts with Elder horrors. Yet they are still Elders in good standing in the Church of Treasure. We practice open ecclesiasticism."

Quote :: "Don't take this the wrong way, but I think you need to be a little more... critical regarding this faith business.

"That's like saying you should piss a little more in your beer before drinking it. Some things are best in their purest form, m'lady".

Quote :: To think it was for your protection, or so that you could benefit the state on the behalf of a deity, is more than a little egotistical."

"I am but a humble servant of gods without and within. Should they favor me with talkative guardian angels, it is a reflection only of their mercy...

... besides, and I quote the Dragon Catechism, "Pride cometh before the Ascension!"

Posts : 174 Join date : 2008-08-27

Religious zealots... there's no reasoning with them, Christabel thinks, more amused than anything else by Yatagan's answer. With a laugh and a grin, she says, "Well. Whatever works for you."

Posts : 1428 Join date : 2008-08-22

Penelope wrote:: Whatever works for you."

"Spoken like a true Dragon!

Say, I've never bought a goblet of wine for an immortal before... please allow me the honour."

Posts : 1078 Join date : 2008-08-21

Mallus wrote:: "How can you say we weren't prepared? We had faith, and the gods delivered you in our moment of need, right on schedule."

Artichoke winces slightly, thinking of his vision of the pig and hoping that he isn't really dealing with divine pork here. "Personally, while I'm happy when faith works out for you ... or us, I don't want to be in a position where I need to count on it to save my, um, bacon."

He watches the exchange between Christabel and Yatagan, slightly amused by the earnestness of each. Even though his personal beliefs lean more closely toward the deva's, the balding warrior cannot help wondering if there's more to this divine pig thing, after all.

Mallus wrote:: "Spoken like a true Dragon!

Say, I've never bought a goblet of wine for an immortal before... please allow me the honour."

"Good idea," says Artichoke, answering before Christabel can, as he rises. "If we're going to go out for a drink, let's be about it." And then we can get out of this smell. He heads for the door, presumably with some of the others coming along.

Posts : 799 Join date : 2008-08-21

Vox, not bothering to get out of his chair, vanishes and re-appears next to the door. "Drink," he says, throwing the door open, "Sounds like an excllent idea. I think that we need to discuss this job that you've lined up, Mr. Artichoke."

He looks around and takes a cautious step outside. "What about The Clockwork Moon? It's not far from here, and it's less of a dive than most."

Posts : 1078 Join date : 2008-08-21

Rolzup wrote:: Vox, not bothering to get out of his chair, vanishes and re-appears next to the door.

Artichoke lifts an eyebrow. "A shadar-kai of many talents, I see."

Quote :: He looks around and takes a cautious step outside. "What about The Clockwork Moon? It's not far from here, and it's less of a dive than most."

"Fine by me," says Artichoke, before grinning and jerking a thumb at Yatagan. "I believe Sir Fracas is going to be paying for the first round, anyway."

Posts : 1428 Join date : 2008-08-22

At The Clockwork Moon, Yatagan, being a Dragonborn of his word, at least to the extent he remembers them, stands the first round.

"Mr. Dare, I don't mean to presume your poison. You're counterpart liked brandy, absinthe, and a peculiar crystal-clear concoction that I believe was rainwater and grain alcohol with a tincture of opium dissolved within. I'd caution against that one..."

Later, Yatagan launches into the story of Church of Treasure, a semi-coherent mixture of truth, the play's version of events, and some fabrications du jour. After a few more rounds, he follows up with a loud discussion of group's enemies, particularly Amadeus Perigee.

Posts : 1078 Join date : 2008-08-21

At the bar, Artichoke gets himself one glass of wine and nurses it, drinking in small sips and mostly watching and listening to the others. Somehow, time spent away from the group seems to be inversely proportional to how much he feels like he needs to drink.

When Yatagan begins to loudly talk about the group's list of enemies, Artichoke's first instinct is to shush him, but then he restrains himself. Instead, he continues to listening, noting any names that he does not already know of. When Yatagan is done, Artichoke turns to Vox. "Seems like you have made a few enemies while I was gone," he says quietly. "Tell me what you think about them. Especially Perigee. Is what Yatagan says about having challenged him true? And if so ... um, why?"

Posts : 1428 Join date : 2008-08-22

shilsen wrote:: And if so ... um, why?"

"That's odd, I don't recall my motivation. I was probably tapping my subconscious wellspring of Draconic cunning."

Posts : 799 Join date : 2008-08-21

"Well, Perigee did brutally murder your dwarf. Although that pales in comparison to what these barbarians did to the poor bastard's corspe.... But yes, I challenged Perigee in Yatigan's name. Better to face him in the open than to be murdered while we sleep, right? And by 'we' I mean 'you', as I need to deal with some matters on the Other Side before something rips the veil asunder and drags me bodily through.

"Besides," Vox adds, "I don't think that it would be entirely safe for me to enter a bloody 'spirit trap', all things considered." He takes a drink of wine, and looks thoughtfully at the ceiling. "In any case, I've little taste for wholesale slaughter."

Posts : 900 Join date : 2008-08-22

Mallus wrote:: "Mr. Dare, I don't mean to presume your poison. You're counterpart liked brandy, absinthe, and a peculiar crystal-clear concoction that I believe was rainwater and grain alcohol with a tincture of opium dissolved within. I'd caution against that one..."

"Rum, please. The darker the better."

Rolzup wrote:: "Besides," Vox adds, "I don't think that it would be entirely safe for me to enter a bloody 'spirit trap', all things considered."

"Yes, as opposed to the rest of us, for whom a trip into some demented tiefling's subconscious is likely to be in a walk in the park on Free Candy Day."

Posts : 1078 Join date : 2008-08-21

Rolzup wrote:: "Well, Perigee did brutally murder your dwarf. Although that pales in comparison to what these barbarians did to the poor bastard's corspe.... But yes, I challenged Perigee in Yatigan's name. Better to face him in the open than to be murdered while we sleep, right?

"Umm, right," says Artichoke, with a furrowed brow. "You did say in Yatagan's name, right?"

Quote :: And by 'we' I mean 'you', as I need to deal with some matters on the Other Side before something rips the veil asunder and drags me bodily through.

"So you are leaving soon? Any idea when you might return?"

Quote :: "Besides," Vox adds, "I don't think that it would be entirely safe for me to enter a bloody 'spirit trap', all things considered." He takes a drink of wine, and looks thoughtfully at the ceiling. "In any case, I've little taste for wholesale slaughter."

"Really?" says Yatagan, with genuine curiosity. "So why did you end up with...," he waves a hand eloquently at the group.

Posts : 799 Join date : 2008-08-21

gridley wrote:: "Yes, as opposed to the rest of us, for whom a trip into some demented tiefling's subconscious is likely to be in a walk in the park on Free Candy Day."

"Were both of your parents alive at the time of your conception, Mr. Dare? If so, I suspect that you've nothing to worry about. I cannot say the same."

Shilsen wrote:: Umm, right," says Artichoke, with a furrowed brow. "You did say in Yatagan's name, right?"

"I do hope that you're not insulted -- I would have laid the blame at your feet, seeing as how you're in charge of this circus, but at the time you'd fled to parts unknown."

Shilsen wrote:: "So you are leaving soon? Any idea when you might return?"

"A few weeks, I should think. I'm going to need to call in a lot of favors, practice my grovelling, and likely accept some deeply unpleasant duties for a bit."

Shilsen wrote:: "Really?" says Yatagan, with genuine curiosity. "So why did you end up with...," he waves a hand eloquently at the group.

"Because their wholesale slaughter was playing merry hob with newly arrived souls, all confused and angry and uncertain. Really, it's not too much trouble to say a few words, is it? Let them know that they're dead?"

Posts : 1428 Join date : 2008-08-22

gridley wrote:: "Rum, please. The darker the better."

"Done!"

Quote :: ...on Free Candy Day."

"There's a Free Candy Day?! Why wasn't I told!?" exclaims Yatagan.

If the evening wears on unmolested, Yatagan will begin casting about for people deserving of righteous provocation, so as to perchance indulge Artichoke's practice fetish.

Posts : 900 Join date : 2008-08-22

Mallus wrote:: If the evening wears on unmolested...

...then we shall have to be ones to do the molesting!