Ethical Circus hijinks

"I wonder," says Odanais, "will raiding the arena be enough to guarantee we bankrupt him on the bets he's taken. Or do we actually have to make certain the fighters he's backing lose first. I'm not quite streetwise enough to understand how these things work."

gridley wrote:

"I wonder," says Odanais, "will raiding the arena be enough to guarantee we bankrupt him on the bets he's taken. Or do we actually have to make certain the fighters he's backing lose first. I'm not quite streetwise enough to understand how these things work."

Dandy shakes his head. "Neither, actually. What I want is to raid the place after the fighting has begun, so that we can catch Clagoff, and anyone else there, red-handed. That would be enough to ensure he's disposed of more or less permanently." His face takes on a slightly grimmer expression. "And while we'll attempt to minimize damage during the raid, if Clagoff meets an 'unfortunate accident' during it, I won't be shedding any tears."

"You have my axe for your raid."

"And my divine semen-coated axe" says Yatagan.

overeddie wrote:

"You have my axe for your raid."

Mallus wrote:

"And my divine semen-coated axe" says Yatagan.

Lord Dandy somehow keeps his face unchanged, but behind him Guyon's eyes bulge slightly as his lips twitch, while Bradamante is clearly biting the inside of her cheeks. After a couple of seconds of silence, Dandy carefully says, "Thank you for the offer."

He continues, almost musing aloud, "Now what I would like to do is find out as much about the location as possible, so that we can - preferably - hit it from multiple directions at once, and hopefully cover all the exits. My people can take care of that. And I'd like to ideally get some people inside before we hit the place, but," his eyes flicker around the idiosyncratic group before him, "I don't think that's really an option with you, since Clagoff knows you well. Perhaps you'll work best as one of the strike teams taking one of the entrances/exits?" He pauses, as if waiting for any input.

"Oh, and..." says Odanias, fidgeting slightly, "my... my randomly setting fire to things?"

shilsen wrote:

I don't think that's really an option with you, since Clagoff knows you well.

"We have some ability with disguises" says Yatagan, apparently quite seriously.

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Perhaps you'll work best as one of the strike teams taking one of the entrances/exits?"

"Of course. Now a man of Clagoff's cowardice will most certainly have an escape route planned, likely one suited to his motile proclivities. Perhaps a prodigiously-sized chimney he could float out of? We should cover those with crossbowmen, or perhaps yeoman armed with pots of boiling fat."

"I can inflitrate the place during the...festivities," Vox says casually. "I doubt that I'll have much problem getting in unseen, and I can keep an eye on Clagoff once I've done so. And a knife in him, when and if it becomes appropriate."

Mallus wrote:

"We have some ability with disguises" says Yatagan, apparently quite seriously.

At these words, Bradamante quickly steps forward, saying, "If I may, sir?" She leans down and whispers into Dandy's ear. Though most of what she says is inaudible, Penelope and Heyoka hear her say "blonde wig." Dandy's face remains calm and as she steps back, he rubs his upper lip thoughtfully, but says nothing.

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"Of course. Now a man of Clagoff's cowardice will most certainly have an escape route planned, likely one suited to his motile proclivities. Perhaps a prodigiously-sized chimney he could float out of? We should cover those with crossbowmen, or perhaps yeoman armed with pots of boiling fat."

Rolzup wrote:

"I can inflitrate the place during the...festivities," Vox says casually. "I doubt that I'll have much problem getting in unseen, and I can keep an eye on Clagoff once I've done so. And a knife in him, when and if it becomes appropriate."

"Good suggestions," says Dandy. "I'll see what I can do about having archers on the rooftops near the area, and maybe even get a Navy airship, though I seriously doubt the governor will let me have one at such short notice." He looks at Vox. "And if you can get in, even better. As you said, you'd be able to keep an eye on Clagoff and help prevent his escape. Is there any way you would be able to contact us outside? Then you could tell us the perfect moment to strike."

shilsen wrote:

"And if you can get in, even better. As you said, you'd be able to keep an eye on Clagoff and help prevent his escape. Is there any way you would be able to contact us outside? Then you could tell us the perfect moment to strike."

OOC: Did we decide that Battlefield Elocution needs line of sight? I vaguely remember that being the case; it would, otherwise, be perfect. Ish.

Vox frowns. "Not easily," he says slowly, "Even a Thunderstone, or something explosive, would be difficult to hear outside, over the clamor of battle. And whatever spells I might work would take too long to cast to be of any use."

"Magistrate," says Odanais, "would your or your associates have any sort of information regarding Clagoff's more dangerous henchmen? Matra Chorokh has of course taken herself out of the game by attacking us early, but knowing who might most threaten your righteous endeavor will allow us to more easily make quick targets of them."

"Also," adds Odanais, in what he hopes is a charming and casual manner, "I was curious what would become of Clagoff's boat-like home should he be more incarcerated or... as is more likely the case... killed? You see, as it happens, we are currently investigating options for a new headquarters for our theatrical outreach and temple of our new religion."

"Perhaps you could find a chimney and send up a rocket, Mr. Cadaveris. They're very useful, you know". Yatagan goes to hand Vox one of his pyrotechnics, only to realize, belatedly, that he shot the last of cache into That-Which-Is-Not.

gridley wrote:

You see, as it happens, we are currently investigating options for a new headquarters for our theatrical outreach and temple of our new religion."

OOC: Good Lord... it's the Queen Porky.

Rolzup wrote:

Vox frowns. "Not easily," he says slowly, "Even a Thunderstone, or something explosive, would be difficult to hear outside, over the clamor of battle. And whatever spells I might work would take too long to cast to be of any use."

Odanais thinks on this for a moment. "If you think you could sneak me in with you, Mr. Cadavaris, I could prepare a Magic Mouth ritual at the location where Lord Dandy's troops have readied themselves and trigger it when we're ready for them."

Odanais thinks on this for a moment. "Mr. Cadavaris, I could prepare a Magic Mouth ritual at the location where Lord Dandy's troops have readied themselves and set it to trigger when you... say... snap your fingers."

Rolzup wrote:

OOC: Did we decide that Battlefield Elocution needs line of sight? I vaguely remember that being the case; it would, otherwise, be perfect. Ish.

Yes, or line of effect, to be precise.

gridley wrote:

Odanais thinks on this for a moment. "Mr. Cadavaris, I could prepare a Magic Mouth ritual at the location where Lord Dandy's troops have readied themselves and set it to trigger when you... say... snap your fingers."

The description of Magic Mouth spell is pretty ambiguous about what "conditions are met" means. I'm going to use the 3e parameters, which are as follows:

"The spell functions when specific conditions are fulfilled according to your command as set in the spell. Commands can be as general or as detailed as desired, although only visual and audible triggers can be used. Triggers react to what appears to be the case. Disguises and illusions can fool them. Normal darkness does not defeat a visual trigger, but magical darkness or invisibility does. Silent movement or magical silence defeats audible triggers. Audible triggers can be keyed to general types of noises or to a specific noise or spoken word. Actions can serve as triggers if they are visible or audible. A magic mouth cannot distinguish alignment, level, Hit Dice, or class except by external garb.

The range limit of a trigger is 15 feet per caster level, so a 6th-level caster can command a magic mouth to respond to triggers as far as 90 feet away. Regardless of range, the mouth can respond only to visible or audible triggers and actions in line of sight or within hearing distance."

In short, the Magic Mouth can't trigger if Vox is in a room somewhere else clicking his fingers.

IC post coming up.

gridley wrote:

"Magistrate," says Odanais, "would your or your associates have any sort of information regarding Clagoff's more dangerous henchmen? Matra Chorokh has of course taken herself out of the game by attacking us early, but knowing who might most threaten your righteous endeavor will allow us to more easily make quick targets of them."

"I'll have that checked on," says Dandy. "Everyone knows that Clagoff has a couple of mages on retainer, partly because he can barely move around without their aid, and that he likes to hire orc mercenaries. But I'll see what else I can learn."

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"Also," adds Odanais, in what he hopes is a charming and casual manner, "I was curious what would become of Clagoff's boat-like home should he be more incarcerated or... as is more likely the case... killed? You see, as it happens, we are currently investigating options for a new headquarters for our theatrical outreach and temple of our new religion."

Dandy grins at that. "Unfortunately, I doubt we'd be able to take that property, since it's legally bought and he does have family residing there with him. But if we can, you'll be the first to know."

Since it's going to be at least another week before we play and in the interests of giving you a few more goodies to mess around with, everybody level up to 6th. As usual, switch out your current equipment accordingly, i.e. pick one 5th, one 6th and one 7th lvl item, as well as 1000 gp in cash. We'll assume that's a combination of your equipment improving and the stuff you got from the fight with Matra Chorokh. The 1000 gp which you got from Gideon Fix is extra on top of that.

Let me know if you have any questions.

Excellent! Level 6 means we can get the Sending ritual, which (I don't have the books in front of me) will probably solve our signaling the troops situation.

Oooh... Yatagan will have Wrath of the Gods (everyone adds his CHA modifier to damage until the end of the encounter) which is perfect for a little light strike-teaming.

shilsen wrote:

But I'll see what else I can learn."

"I believe he employs an Eladrin woman... Lady Wicketty-whack or some such. I worry the lethality of her blade is inversely proportional to the dignity of her name."

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...and he does have family residing there with him.

"What if the family were to abandon their property and flee the Port in terror?" asks Yatagan, momentarily indulging in the hypothetical.

gridley wrote:

Excellent! Level 6 means we can get the Sending ritual, which (I don't have the books in front of me) will probably solve our signaling the troops situation.

Yes, it will. The only downside is that it has a 10 minute casting time, which means it's unlikely Vox could cast it inside the place where the fights are occurring. But if Odanais casts it at a planned time (say, starting 5 minutes after Vox enters, so that it's completed 15 minutes after he does so), he can mentally contact Vox and receive a message about the situation.

Oh, and did I mention that one of the level 6 wizard utilities is Disguise Self? Though you have some other very good options too - Dimension Door, Dispel Magic and Invisibility, for example.

Mallus wrote:

Oooh... Yatagan will have Wrath of the Gods (everyone adds his CHA modifier to damage until the end of the encounter) which is perfect for a little light strike-teaming.

Damn, that is good!

And you are so going to need it. Since this will be my last time DMing for a while, I'm hoping to leave you guys with a bang. There will be lots of hurting!

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"I believe he employs an Eladrin woman... Lady Wicketty-whack or some such. I worry the lethality of her blade is inversely proportional to the dignity of her name."

Dandy furrows his brow for a second, before Guyon speaks up and says, "Lady Snikersnak, Sir. But she's no longer in the city." As the magistrate glances at him, the bailiff continues, "We had to speak to her about a minor matter three days ago, and she took ship to the Isles, I believe. I heard she does that regularly."

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"What if the family were to abandon their property and flee the Port in terror?" asks Yatagan, momentarily indulging in the hypothetical.

Dandy chuckles this time. "Then, depending on the details, it might come into the hands of the authorities. Who might sell, rent or bestow it on well-meaning citizens. Maybe."

When Odanais mentions the Sending ritual, the magistrate nods. "That sounds perfect for our purposes. Thank you. It seems your presence will facilitate matters greatly." He indicates the note from Loach. "As it already has."

shilsen wrote:

Yes, it will. The only downside is that it has a 10 minute casting time, which means it's unlikely Vox could cast it inside the place where the fights are occurring. But if Odanais casts it at a planned time (say, starting 5 minutes after Vox enters, so that it's completed 15 minutes after he does so), he can mentally contact Vox and receive a message about the situation.

Groovy!

shilsen wrote:

Oh, and did I mention that one of the level 6 wizard utilities is Disguise Self? Though you have some other very good options too - Dimension Door, Dispel Magic and Invisibility, for example.

And groovier! Yeah, those are all excellent. I think Odanais would have a hard time turning down Disguise Self.

shilsen wrote:

Dandy chuckles this time. "Then, depending on the details, it might come into the hands of the authorities. Who might sell, rent or bestow it on well-meaning citizens. Maybe."

Hehe...

gridley wrote:

And groovier! Yeah, those are all excellent. I think Odanais would have a hard time turning down Disguise Self.

My god...he could make himself look like his own sister!

"You know, Odanais hasn't left his room in almost three weeks now...."

"Don't ask. Don't even think about asking."

Rolzup wrote:

My god...he could make himself look like his own sister!

"You know, Odanais hasn't left his room in almost three weeks now...."

"Don't ask. Don't even think about asking."

You just gave me a flashback to Mick and Bianca Jagger.

Rolzup wrote:

gridley wrote:

And groovier! Yeah, those are all excellent. I think Odanais would have a hard time turning down Disguise Self.

My god...he could make himself look like his own sister!

"You know, Odanais hasn't left his room in almost three weeks now...."

"Don't ask. Don't even think about asking."

Haha... he might even insist on adventuring as his sister.