To Hell On High Water

On the docks, the Swine Manor Boys met the man who chartered the voyage, Count Orquiel, who has been summoned back to the Hells by Emperor Orcus. In addition to some servants, he is bringing a Tiefling bodyguard named Chandra Khan and the surly bull-headed artist Jackson Moloch.

On the fifth day of travel, as they sailed around the outer edges of The Storm What Wears A Face, the sea grew still and cold, The Unforbidden was attacked a gigantic, frosty, four-headed sea kitten. Captain Screwtape attempted to stop the creature's rampage by invoking her deity, Father Dagon, but the kitten said, ""You have no authority over me, little thing! It is Father Dagon himself who wants your cargo at the bottom of the deep!" It then picked up Captain Screwtape in its mouth, shook her and spit her out on the deck.

While Chandra, Lizzie, Pogsley, Yatagan, and Fagin battled the monster (with a little help from the the ship's cannons), Captain Screwtape lay on the deck sobbing and beseeching Father Dagon not to abandon her. Her hood and the strips of cloth covering her face were thrown aside by the attack, revealing her to be a white-skinned Tiefling who had cut of her horns.

Chandra and Fagin recognize her for what she is immediately: one of the Velrinc Tieflings.

The Velrinc were a tribe of Tieflings who once served Emperor Orcus as oracles and spies until they were accused of working for his enemies and exiled from the Infernal Isles forever. They are now considered
walking symbols of treachery by most Tieflings. In order to hide their identity, they snip their tails at birth, wear clothing that mostly hides their pale white skin and they file their horns daily.

After tending to Pogsley, Yatagan approaches the distraught Tiefling. "Do you require healing, Captain Screwtape? If so, allow me to lay-on-tail".

Chakram looks around with a broad smile, flourishes her falchion dramatically, and then slides it back into the scabbard. As the tiefling warrior steps towards the captain, her form begins to shift, the diabolic transformation that she had undergone during the battle reversing itself. The bulging muscles shrink, the flaming red eyes lose their glow, and her horns, which had extended to resemble those of a large buffalo, diminish to their original size.

"Good fight!" she says to the others, the tones strong but mellifluous as usual, "I see that your abilities in battle match your reputation. It was a pleasure to fight by your side! Maybe we'll get to do that again," Chakram says, smiling at the thought.

The smile fades as she steps over to the captain's side and, if Yatagan has not already done so, extends a hand to help Screwtape to her feet. If Yatagan has already done so, Chakram steps to the side to pick up the dropped hood and facecloths, before extending them wordlessly to the captain. A Velrinc? The Count will find this information interesting.

Vox staggers back from the rail, his normal pallor still a particularly lovely shade of green.

Is to be standing still, whines the voice in his head, Balance is for being wrong, not properly centered! Is no wonder self is feeling sick, when Not-Quite-Dead-Man moves likes dyspeptic cow!

"Go to hell," Vow whispers, grabbing hold of the mast. "And be quick about it, please! I beg you!"

Raising his voice, he inquires tremulously, "How, precisely, have we managed to offend Dagon? I suspect that you're at fault here, Yatigan! Somehow."

Mallus wrote:

"Do you require healing, Captain Screwtape? If so, allow me to lay-on-tail".

Captain Screwtape studies the Dragonborn for a moment in somewhat bewildered fashion. "No, I'm only a little bruised. I don't think it wanted me dead."

shilsen wrote:

The smile fades as she steps over to the captain's side and, if Yatagan has not already done so, extends a hand to help Screwtape to her feet. If Yatagan has already done so, Chakram steps to the side to pick up the dropped hood and facecloths, before extending them wordlessly to the captain.

With Chakram's help, Videka Screwtape gets to her feet. Accepting her hood and facecloths, she raises them to her face, then shrugs and stuffs them into her belt instead.

Cuulus and Zebulon Morrow emerge from below decks and report to her about the state of the ship: some minor damage, one crewmember dead from frozen vomit.

"It could have been much worse," says Cuulus.

"And it would have been if not for our new friends here," she says, gesturing towards you lot.

Rolzup wrote:

Raising his voice, he inquires tremulously, "How, precisely, have we managed to offend Dagon? I suspect that you're at fault here, Yatigan! Somehow."

Captain Screwtape arches a perfect white eyebrow at that. "Do you think it might be something you have done or brought aboard my ship that angered Father Dagon?" Her tone, you think, seems more hopeful than accusatory.

gridley wrote:

Captain Screwtape arches a perfect white eyebrow at that. "Do you think it might be something you have done or brought aboard my ship that angered Father Dagon?" Her tone, you think, seems more hopeful than accusatory.

An amused smile steals over Chakram's aquiline features and she folds her arms, looking around at those around her, particularly Yatagan and Gepettojack. I wonder what they'll say.


OOC: Of course, Chakram doesn't know exactly what the others brought on board. Nice one, Steve!

gridley wrote:

Captain Screwtape arches a perfect white eyebrow at that. "Do you think it might be something you have done or brought aboard my ship that angered Father Dagon?" Her tone, you think, seems more hopeful than accusatory.

Yatagan cocks his head. He notes her tone of voice. Sometimes his understanding of people, even the mammalian ones, makes up for his deficiency of intellect.

"I'm afraid there's truth in that" says Yatagan gravely. "I am swaddled in divinity, like a mewling babe wrapped in majesty. Majesties, in fact. More than one. I am sorry if that caused offense to your jealous god."

Yatagan's initially somber tone gives way as his voice fills with the Draconic virtue of pride.

"For the remainder of the journey I shall endeavor to pull the cloak of humility over my admittedly massive metaphysical frame. It shan't be easy, it's like stuffing a grand cathedral into a sack, but I'll do so in the interest of everyone's safety."

OOC: note Yatagan is deliberately trying to divert the captain's attention/blame to himself. It's a paladin thing -- ie playing the martyr.

Mallus wrote:

OOC: note Yatagan is deliberately trying to divert the captain's attention/blame to himself. It's a paladin thing -- ie playing the martyr.

OOC: Isn't that an old Tiefling musical instrument? "I'm in a band." "Oh, what instrument?" "I play the martyr."

Mallus wrote:

"For the remainder of the journey I shall endeavor to pull the cloak of humility over my admittedly massive metaphysical frame. It shan't be easy, it's like stuffing a grand cathedral into a sack, but I'll do so in the interest of everyone's safety."

"...and good taste," Vox mutters under his breath.

His color slowly fading, he tentatively releases the mast and takes a shaky step forward. "Captain, is there any kind of offering we can make to Dagon? Something other than a human sacrifice, ideally. Just something to, perhaps, incline him to look a little more favorably upon us?"

Rolzup wrote:

"Captain, is there any kind of offering we can make to Dagon? Something other than a human sacrifice, ideally. Just something to, perhaps, incline him to look a little more favorably upon us?"

"At Court Orquiel's request I've been working on a short skit, one in which I am to be the recipient of considerable physical violence, real sword blows to head and such. Perhaps if I'm also subject to vulgar insults... and covered in filth... for instance, flayed and gutted rats."

Delicious, delicious filth thinks Yatagan.

"Might the debasement of my flesh appease Father Dagon? The Port crowd absolutely adored it."

shilsen wrote:

Nice one, Steve!

ooc: Thanks. Will you be reporting to the Count?

Mallus wrote:

"For the remainder of the journey I shall endeavor to pull the cloak of humility over my admittedly massive metaphysical frame. It shan't be easy, it's like stuffing a grand cathedral into a sack, but I'll do so in the interest of everyone's safety."

"Yes," she says, considering Yatagan's words carefully. "If only your cloak was large enough to hide us all."

Rolzup wrote:

OOC: Isn't that an old Tiefling musical instrument? "I'm in a band." "Oh, what instrument?" "I play the martyr."

ooc: Haha!

Rolzup wrote:

His color slowly fading, he tentatively releases the mast and takes a shaky step forward. "Captain, is there any kind of offering we can make to Dagon? Something other than a human sacrifice, ideally. Just something to, perhaps, incline him to look a little more favorably upon us?"

"I fear that the only sacrifice that will appease Him at this moment is the sinking of my ship," says Captain Screwtape. "And that is one I am unwilling to make."

Mallus wrote:

"Might the debasement of my flesh appease Father Dagon? The Port crowd absolutely adored it."

"I'm afraid that pain freely given is unappealing to my Lord," she continues grimly, "the flavor being in the taking. But don't that let that stop you."

gridley wrote:

ooc: Thanks. Will you be reporting to the Count?

Yup. Chakram would already have filled him in on all she's learned thus far.

What's his response?

Rolzup wrote:

OOC: Isn't that an old Tiefling musical instrument? "I'm in a band." "Oh, what instrument?" "I play the martyr."

OOC: beautiful!

gridley wrote:

"If only your cloak was large enough to hide us all."

"It *is* rather roomy" says Yatagan reassuringly. "Regardless, we'll meet any emissary Father Dagon sends against us with the same winning combination of cannon fire, steel and semen."

gridley wrote:

"I'm afraid that pain freely given is unappealing to my Lord," she continues grimly, "the flavor being in the taking. But don't that let that stop you."

"I could tie a few pillows around Mr. Cadaveris's midsection and have him play me!" says Yatagan excitedly. "He does not lack for unwillingness when it comes to being grievously injured. Though I'd have to change the script some. It's not currently a romance."

shilsen wrote:

Chakram would already have filled him in on all she's learned thus far.

What's his response?

"Oy gevald!" cries Count Orquiel, snapping his mighty crocodile jaw shut with a percussive clink that sends the dozens of miniscule demons that labor constantly at cleaning his teeth flying away on their tiny wings. "If I am seen exiting a ship commanded by a Velrinc, I might as well slip the noose around my neck myself. You'll have to kill her or something before we arrive."

The Count walks over to a leather satchel containing some of his papers and begins fumbling through them.

"Now, as to the second matter... There was something in one of these letters about Dagon. Yes, here it is. That gossiping old queer The Bishop of Broken Rings related a rumor to me that Lord Demogorgon has allied himself with Dagon. Harumph! Most of the letter is foolishness, mere paranoid ramblings, but if there's truth to this bit about the alliance, then it could be preamble to a new attempt by Demogorgon to usurp the throne from Emperor Orcus."

He sneers as he thinks silently to himself.

"Learn all you can about any cargo aboard that may have enraged Dagon."

gridley wrote:

"Oy gevald!" cries Count Orquiel, snapping his mighty crocodile jaw shut with a percussive clink that sends the dozens of miniscule demons that labor constantly at cleaning his teeth flying away on their tiny wings. "If I am seen exiting a ship commanded by a Velrinc, I might as well slip the noose around my neck myself. You'll have to kill her or something before we arrive."

"Very well, my lord," says Chakram, regular practice allowing keeping her from rolling her eyes. While she has absolutely no qualms at the thought of killing someone simply because it might benefit her, and generally quite enjoys it, she does sometimes get the feeling that the Count hasn't thought through a particular plan. Especially nowadays, after the summons back to the Isles. Which, she muses, Might be a reason for him being recalled in the first place.

Once more, as she has found herself doing more and more often in the recent past, she considers--more or less idly--whether it might not be time to unhook her chariot from the still flaming but potentially fading meteor that is Orquiel's career. Loyalty is something Chakram understands and values, much less for intrinsic reasons than because it is a very valuable reputation to have in her line of work. But it is only a means to an end - nothing more.

Quote :

The Count walks over to a leather satchel containing some of his papers and begins fumbling through them.

"Now, as to the second matter... There was something in one of these letters about Dagon. Yes, here it is. That gossiping old queer The Bishop of Broken Rings related a rumor to me that Lord Demogorgon has allied himself with Dagon. Harumph! Most of the letter is foolishness, mere paranoid ramblings, but if there's truth to this bit about the alliance, then it could be preamble to a new attempt by Demogorgon to usurp the throne from Emperor Orcus."

He sneers as he thinks silently to himself.

"Learn all you can about any cargo aboard that may have enraged Dagon."

Chakram nods her head, the reference to Demogorgon intriguing her. On one hand, she has some doubts about how closely she wants to be involved with a battle for the throne. On the other hand, she thinks, her natural bloodthirstiness coming to the fore, That would probably make for some utterly glorious carnage. And if anything would recapture the glory of the Turathi, that would be it. If I survived, of course.

But that is a question for the future. For now, getting to the Isles in one piece is the primary aim. And learning more of this motley crew of mortals, which are certainly making the voyage much more interesting.

If there is nothing else from the Count, she takes her leave and heads back on deck, looking for any of the travelers who may be present there.

OOC: What does Chakram know of Demogorgon, especially his position vis-a-vis Orcus?

shilsen wrote:

OOC: What does Chakram know of Demogorgon, especially his position vis-a-vis Orcus?

After Emperor Asmodeus was killed in the destruction of the city of Pandemonium, the Infernal Isles entered a period called The Interregnum, during which the major demons fought for control of the Hells for centuries. During this struggle, Demogorgon was the chief rival of Orcus. But battlefields full of dead Tieflings and demons supplied ever more troops to the undead legion of Orcus. As his forces grew ever larger and more unbeatable, Orcus forged a peace that would make each of his most powerful enemies the lord or lady of one of the nine Hells. This end to open hostilities paved the way for the covert scheming, backroom backstabbing, and malicious blackmailing of the current Hells.

Lord Demogorgon is both ruler of the island of Malbolge and the commander of the Infernal Navy. Of all those who covet the throne upon which Orcus sits, none is considered a more credible threat than Lord Demogorgon.

gridley wrote:

After Emperor Asmodeus was killed in the destruction of the city of Pandemonium, the Infernal Isles entered a period called The Interregnum, during which the major demons fought for control of the Hells for centuries. During this struggle, Demogorgon was the chief rival of Orcus. But battlefields full of dead Tieflings and demons supplied ever more troops to the undead legion of Orcus. As his forces grew ever larger and more unbeatable, Orcus forged a peace that would make each of his most powerful enemies the lord or lady of one of the nine Hells. This end to open hostilities paved the way for the covert scheming, backroom backstabbing, and malicious blackmailing of the current Hells.

Lord Demogorgon is both ruler of the island of Malbolge and the commander of the Infernal Navy. Of all those who covet the throne upon which Orcus sits, none is considered a more credible threat than Lord Demogorgon.

Aww - you killed poor Asmodeus off!

shilsen wrote:

Aww - you killed poor Asmodeus off!

Let that be a lesson to him.

gridley wrote:

Let that be a lesson to him.

OOC: or to us?

Mallus wrote:

gridley wrote:

Let that be a lesson to him.

OOC: or to us?

Indeed.

Mallus wrote:

"I could tie a few pillows around Mr. Cadaveris's midsection and have him play me!" says Yatagan excitedly. "He does not lack for unwillingness when it comes to being grievously injured. Though I'd have to change the script some. It's not currently a romance."

"I doubt that I could manage to emulate your particular...elan. Not convincingly, at any rate. And for that, we should both be thankful. I am going to go lay down for a bit, I think."

Once he has some privacy, Vox addresses Dexter. "Go forth, do a bit of searching about, find what you can. See what's hidden in the hold...."

OOC: I can't remember how far away a familiar can go -- 100 feet, I think? It's not in the Compendium, for some damned reason. Not far, but it's not all that big a ship, really. Dexter's got a 24 for Stealth, a 22 for Thievery, and can open latches and such.

Rolzup wrote:

Mallus wrote:

"I could tie a few pillows around Mr. Cadaveris's midsection and have him play me!" says Yatagan excitedly. "He does not lack for unwillingness when it comes to being grievously injured. Though I'd have to change the script some. It's not currently a romance."

"I doubt that I could manage to emulate your particular...elan. Not convincingly, at any rate. And for that, we should both be thankful. I am going to go lay down for a bit, I think."

Once he has some privacy, Vox addresses Dexter. "Go forth, do a bit of searching about, find what you can. See what's hidden in the hold...."

OOC: I can't remember how far away a familiar can go -- 100 feet, I think? It's not in the Compendium, for some damned reason. Not far, but it's not all that big a ship, really. Dexter's got a 24 for Stealth, a 22 for Thievery, and can open latches and such.

Dexter returns to Vox somewhat... ahem... empty-handed. The cargo in the hold is minimal: several cases of Lord Rum's Special Reserve Rum, about twenty cases of wine, and a collection of medicinal herbs from the Great Girding Forest.

Yatagan retires as well. To the hold. He commands his armor into the shape of a rural Dragonborn monk's robes, which is to say a tax assessors, which tells you quite a bit about his culture's philosophy.

"I can do humble" says Yatagan proudly to himself.

Once safely amongst the cargo, Yatagan draws out the Codpiece God and prays softly, "Oh Hidden God, is it you Dagon wishes to sink?"

Go, dice, go....

The member 'gridley' has done the following action : Dice Roller

'd20' : 13

Mallus wrote:

Once safely amongst the cargo, Yatagan draws out the Codpiece God and prays softly, "Oh Hidden God, is it you Dagon wishes to sink?"

The god grows briefly heavy in Yatagan's hand and two thoughts splash unbidden and simultaneously into the shallow water of his mind. One is the word "uncertain" and the other is "unlikely."