A funny thing happened on the way to the theatre

After a particularly busy day which involved:

* Being threatened by and then punching a wererat thug (Hans Pitir)
* Visiting a possibly crazy old lady (Clarissa Glossop), meeting one of her wards (Star) and being hired to find her other ward (Pit) whether he's dead or not
* Climbing down a hole, fighting zombies and wraiths, finding rifts to the Other Side and discovering that Pit is dead
* Having the crotch-god manifest itself and save them from the wraiths
* Visiting Lord Dandy, the Magistrate in charge of the Ethical Circus, and not pissing him off
* Visiting Captain Clagoff and getting him to agree to a play-off to decide Treasure's ownership
* Being attacked by two wererats who work for Hans, killing one, cutting the other's limbs off and throwing her through a window to provide a warning

the members of the League wake from a restful sleep in the morning. When they descend to the common room for breakfast, they find two messages waiting for them.

One is a plain, unmarked envelope, left for them, which contains a list of possible locations for a play in the Ethical Circus. Though there is no name or any other information from the sender, this is presumably the promised information from Dandy.

The other message, which is delivered by a man who waits for them, contains a note from Clarissa Glossop and a purse of 500 gold. The note says:

“Star informed me that you found my beloved Pit’s remains and that there was some problem with undead which you dealt with. Thank you for the information and your efforts. Please locate Pit in the Hereafter as soon as you can. The accompanying purse should help with expenses. Let me know when you discover his whereabouts and if you need more to expedite the process.”

Which leaves the group with lots on their plate. A play to complete and put on in a week's time. A visit to the Hereafter to locate Pit. Possible action against Hans Pitir. Or anything else which they might come up with.

Sitting with Sappho purring in her lap, Penelope mentally tallies the various things they need to accomplish. Pitir's attempt to bully the League both verbally and physically leaves the archer unhappy and worried about her group's security (particularly Treasure's, though she notes her concern for the others with slight, mostly reflexive disdain), especially since their tavern is in a district the thuggish dwarf has limited control of. I should've just killed him... no more warnings...

"Before working on the... umm... play and finding Pit, I'd like to eliminate Hans Pitir as a threat. Completely." Turning to Yatagan, she adds, "Letting him live was obviously an unwise move on my part." She shakes her head regretfully. "Leaving him alive obviously means he'll send his people after us - we can't have that. We need to see if our message got through. And if it didn't, we need to take care of him for good."

"Very well Ms. Pindar" says Yatagan, looking up from the parchment he's busily been scribbling on. "But we must kill him in a very dramatic fashion."

He takes a sip of Pernod. During breakfast.

"Time is short. Everything we do this week must serve double-duty as material for the play. We must live art". He breathes deeply, clearly relishing the thought.

"Now who's with me? I'm off to Five Fathoms to purchase explosives."

Mallus wrote:

"Now who's with me? I'm off to Five Fathoms to purchase explosives."

What's Yatagan planning to do with the explosives? If he intends to blow up Pitir's lair, there are a few issues. Firstly, there's the issue of buying enough explosives to do that and using them effectively (since this isn't really an area of experience for the PCs). Secondly, Pitir lives in - or rather, below - an abandoned warehouse (now lacking a window due to some bastards tossing something through it recently) near the docks, which has buildings on either side and is in the middle of the dockside district, so setting things on fire there would be an issue for the neighborhood. Thirdly, the authorities (read, Magistrate Stefan Petard) would likely take very poorly to explosions inside the city, esp. ones which cause a lot of damage.

Not that any of the above should dissuade you from blowing it up if you really want to, of course

"I hesitate to suggest this," Vox says acidly, "As it might actually minimize the number of innocent people who die in the crossfire, but have you considered just challenging the bastard? Come up with something sufficiently insulting to his masculinity and declaim it in front of his lair, before witnesses. He won't have any choice but to agree.

"Additionally, you can add it to your play, as a soliloquy or something."

Rolzup wrote:

"I hesitate to suggest this," Vox says acidly, "As it might actually minimize the number of innocent people who die in the crossfire...

"I protect innocents" interrupts Yatagan.

Quote :

...but have you considered just challenging the bastard? Come up with something sufficiently insulting to his masculinity and declaim it in front of his lair, before witnesses. He won't have any choice but to agree.

"Can you insult the honor of a man who scurries around in the dark and uses ten thousand tiny lackeys to do his bidding? How would you..." The sentence trails off to silence.

After a moment Yatagan says "Strike that. I'm off to Five Fathoms to purchase a large quantity of rat poison." He quickly glances over at Penelope. "Ah, a particularly clever poison that attacks the essence of rat-ness and thus is harmless to other animals."

"Like cats". The Dragonborn flinches ever so slightly.

Odanais will follow Yatagan on his crazy shopping trip, but when the hour is appropriate for finding her in, he'll stop by the Temple of the Eroded God to chat with Matitia (aka Gilded Orchid) and see if she and any of her fellow dancers would be interested in doing a little moonlighting for our stage production.

gridley wrote:

Odanais will follow Yatagan on his crazy shopping trip...

OOC: Excellent. Nothing untoward ever happens when Odanais and Yatagan walk the streets of the Port together...

Yatagan and Odanais, and anyone else who chooses to accompany them, make their way to Five Fathoms Market and spend some time attempting to purchase rat poison. Considering the variety of things available in the market, obtaining a large quantity of it is easy enough.

Unusually, nothing untoward happens during the shopping trip, though there are more than a few curious glances cast towards the adventurers, perhaps more than might be expected in the eclectic setting of the market. However, considering the attention that the League seems to have drawn from Jimmy Heatshimmer, that's not too surprising.

A visit to the temple of the Eroded God follows. Access is quickly gained via a small donation, and a couple of questions just as quickly help to locate Matitia. The Gilded Orchid is in a small chamber near the Eroded God's chamber which is used for a dressing room by the dancers (and, by the looks of it, by the gladiators who perform for His benefit too), preparing to dance.

"Hey! Who are you pervs?!" shouts a semi-clothed woman as Odanais steps through the curtains, while a couple of other girls grab for coverings. Then Matitia, who is among them, recognizes Odanais and says, "Oh - it's you. Relax," she adds to the other girls, "I know these jokers." There are a few rude mutters but the other women go back to getting ready.

As does Matitia, while gesturing for the adventurers to come over. "So, what are you guys doing here? I heard you found Sebastian and dealt with him. Actually, what did you do? One of the priests said old Horny threw up in his office after your last visit!"

shilsen wrote:

"Actually, what did you do? One of the priests said old Horny threw up in his office after your last visit!"

"We bore witness" says Yatagan faithfully.

shilsen wrote:

"So, what are you guys doing here? I heard you found Sebastian and dealt with him. Actually, what did you do? One of the priests said old Horny threw up in his office after your last visit!"

"Sadly, we had to kill him. He'd turned into hideous, face-stealing monster with a vomit-inducing gaze, faceless zombie minions, and delusions of godhood," says Odanais, casually but respectfully. "You know how it goes."

After apologizing for their entrance and complimenting Matitia on how well she's looking, Odanais gets down to brass tacks. "We're putting on a spectacular, one-night-only, theatrical even next week in the Circus. I have faith that it will be unlike anything even this puzzle of a city has ever seen. And part of the show requires some gorgeous dancing girls." Odanais pauses to let that sink in. "Of course, I immediately thought of you and your colleagues here. Would you be interested? We'll pay double your normal rate."

Vox is visibly nervous during the journey, keeping a wary eye open for any unusually large rats, but relaxes once he's entered the temple. "I've always liked the Eroded One," he observes, "A very honest sort of of fellow, for a god."

gridley wrote:

"Sadly, we had to kill him. He'd turned into hideous, face-stealing monster with a vomit-inducing gaze, faceless zombie minions, and delusions of godhood," says Odanais, casually but respectfully. "You know how it goes."

"That's...going to need an explanation of some sort, I think."

Mallus wrote:

"We bore witness" says Yatagan faithfully.

gridley wrote:

"Sadly, we had to kill him. He'd turned into hideous, face-stealing monster with a vomit-inducing gaze, faceless zombie minions, and delusions of godhood," says Odanais, casually but respectfully. "You know how it goes."

Matitia raises a quizzical eyebrow at Odanais and Yatagan and then shakes her head. "I really don't think I do! And now I don't think I want to." She grins. "Anyway, hearing what happened to Horny was amusing enough. No more details needed. Especially since I just ate!"

Rolzup wrote:

"That's...going to need an explanation of some sort, I think."

The dancer shakes her head firmly. "Nope. Not for me, thanks."

Quote :

After apologizing for their entrance and complimenting Matitia on how well she's looking, Odanais gets down to brass tacks. "We're putting on a spectacular, one-night-only, theatrical even next week in the Circus. I have faith that it will be unlike anything even this puzzle of a city has ever seen. And part of the show requires some gorgeous dancing girls." Odanais pauses to let that sink in. "Of course, I immediately thought of you and your colleagues here. Would you be interested? We'll pay double your normal rate."

This time Matitia raises both eyebrows. "Really? That sounds interesting!" Then she frowns slightly. "This isn't going to be weird, is it? I now you guys are mercs and I'm just a working girl! I'll dance for anyone for the right price but I won't, um, do weird. Stony's good that way. Just watches, doesn't touch, though he could be a little more complimentary! And it's a regular gig." She eyes the adventurers, waiting for them to add more.

A couple of the other girls wander over, seeming interested in the conversation. One looks Penelope up and down, not that she can see much of the archer, and says, "You could be a dancer, girl. You move nicely."

Quote :

A couple of the other girls wander over, seeming interested in the conversation. One looks Penelope up and down, not that she can see much of the archer, and says, "You could be a dancer, girl. You move nicely."

Penelope frowns, not quite sure how to respond. "Thanks?" she says finally, smoothing the black cloth that covers her armor somewhat self-consciously. "I don't think I could do the outfit, unfortunately..."

shilsen wrote:

This time Matitia raises both eyebrows. "Really? That sounds interesting!" Then she frowns slightly. "This isn't going to be weird, is it? I now you guys are mercs and I'm just a working girl! I'll dance for anyone for the right price but I won't, um, do weird. Stony's good that way. Just watches, doesn't touch, though he could be a little more complimentary! And it's a regular gig." She eyes the adventurers, waiting for them to add more.

"Oh no, not weird at all, more artistic than anything," says Odanais. "You would be portraying sexy wraiths doing a tomentuous dance full of clawing and biting until I'm lying dead on the ground beneath your feet."

Odanais glances around, taking in the ladies' reactions. "And then I get brought back to life by a pig."

shilsen wrote:

A couple of the other girls wander over, seeming interested in the conversation. One looks Penelope up and down, not that she can see much of the archer, and says, "You could be a dancer, girl. You move nicely."

"You truly could, Penelope. Maybe you and Sappho could do something together?"

gridley wrote:

"Oh no, not weird at all, more artistic than anything," says Odanais. "You would be portraying sexy wraiths doing a tomentuous dance full of clawing and biting until I'm lying dead on the ground beneath your feet."

Odanais glances around, taking in the ladies' reactions. "And then I get brought back to life by a pig."

Matitia again raises an eyebrow. "Sexy wraiths, huh? And a pig?"

One of the other girls, who has been listening with interest, slaps her hands together and laughs. "So you're the people with the holy pig? I knew I had heard about you people!"

Matitia glances at her and then chuckles as well. "Oh yeah - me too! Sounds like there's a story there. You'll have to tell me some time. But the job sounds amusing. I'll do it, as long as it doesn't get in the way of this one. Horny may be a bit boring, but he pays regularly." She glances at the other girls. "What do you think?"

There are a few desultory responses, mostly on the lines of "Yeah," "Okay," and "Maybe." It seems like the League might have hired a few dancers.

A metagame note: Since I'm not interested in sweating the small stuff (nor, I presume, are you), I'm not going to track costs and such for minor issues such as rat poison and paying dancing girls. I'll just presume that comes out of the money you guys earn/recover. So unless I specifically tell you that you need to mark any money off what you have, assume that any expenses on such things are already included in the treasure totals you get.

I'll mention this in the Treasure and XP thread too.

Next on the to-do list: commission the 'sexy wraith' costumes, poison as many rats in as large a radius around Pitir's lair as we can.

Mallus wrote:

Next on the to-do list: commission the 'sexy wraith' costumes

The League-members head over to the Quadrille and hire some people to work on the costumes, which actually takes less time than explaining to the people involved what the costumes will look like, especially since nobody seems completely certain and there are a few varying ideas. The people they hire also express interest in handling other tailoring/costuming jobs for the production when they come up.

Quote :

, poison as many rats in as large a radius around Pitir's lair as we can.

A large number of people living near the dock area of the Stagger hear knocks on their doors and open them to see a number of League-members standing behind Yatagan as he smilingly announces that he's offering a free service to exterminate vermin. Some slam the door instantly (those who saw the League's activities the previous night usually screaming and piling furniture against the inside of the door), others ask them to leave, and some actually make the error of speaking to the strange visitors. Yatagan manages to persuade many of them to let him in and is able to lay out poison in their homes.

He also lays out as much poison as he can in the streets and sewers of the area. While he is doing so, Yatagan and the others spend a fair bit of time in plain sight of the warehouse beneath which Pitir is supposed to dwell, but there's no sign of the wererat thug (or any life there).


OOC: By the time you guys are done with all the above, it would be well into the evening. Anything else you're planning to do? A visit to the Hereafter, contacting anyone you need to help with the play, seeing about renting a location, getting posters made or any other form of announcement, coming up with the list of potential choices for the 3rd judge, anything else you want to do re. Pitir, etc? Note that you can split up and do different things together.

"So, then, we will be employing living dancers in ghostface rather than actual wraiths? It's in questionable taste, if you ask me, but then I'm not able to rip your souls screaming from your flesh if I get offended."

Vox shrugs. "On the other hand, 'good taste' has never really been a consideration, has it?"

He doesn't wait for an answer. "With nightfall approaching, my time might best be spent making some inquiries into the fate of the prophetically named Pit, eh?"

Rolzup wrote:

...ghostface...

OOC: Brilliant.

Quote :

"With nightfall approaching, my time might best be spent making some inquiries into the fate of the prophetically named Pit, eh?"

"By all means. Perhaps fortune will favor us and something dramatic will occur. Lead on to the Hereafter Mr. Cadaveris" says Yatagan heartily.

"Wait, won't we need a quantity of blood for ah, negotiating purposes?"

Mallus wrote:

"Wait, won't we need a quantity of blood for ah, negotiating purposes?"

"It would be advisable, yes....but...um...so you're all coming with me then? All of you? Well, that's...that's just marvellous, really."

Vox looks frantically around, clearly considers darting down a convenient alley, and then gives up, shoulders slumping. "Dammit. I know a dealer in fine bloods; one Maximillian Feldspar. Ships most of the stuff overseas, but he's certain to have a few bottles about. We can't afford anything fancy, mind, but all we need is the sanguinary equivalent of rotgut."

Traveling to the district called the Hereafter - and Maximillian Feldspar's shop - is fairly simple. From the Quadrille, the League-members cross the bridge over the Ossuary Flow and enter the large district named for (and built around) Gog-Magog Station. In the distance, as they walk by, they see a huge stone golem (either Gog or Magog) stolidly pulls on a gigantic iron chain. Though the chain's end is not visible from their vantage point, the adventurers know it is attached to a train being moved along the Gog-Magog line by the two giant golems.

Heading northwest, the group passes over another bridge. The district on the far side seems curiously quiet, only a few people moving through the streets between the buildings. This is the Hereafter, aka Deadside or Graveside. The largest number of people in sight are actually the couple dozen crossing into or out of the district.

Maximillian Feldspar's shop is a small building on the first street inside the district, with his name on a neat plate on the door. When someone knocks, a second later there is the sound of a bolt being drawn and the door opens partly. A face appears in the gap, a particularly pale one, with a pronounced widow's peak. The man studies the group and then smiles, revealing neatly pointed fangs. "Yes?" he asks politely.

shilsen wrote:

"Yes?" he asks politely.

Yatagan smiles in return, showing his own fangs. Judge a man by the contents of his character, not his method of animation. "Good evening to you, sir. We'd like to buy some blood."

Feeling the need to explain, the paladin continues "As luck would have it, we were offered no opportunities to acquire some from criminals deserving of rough justice. And we're in a bit of a hurry. We have business on the Other Side."

"Something simple, Feldspar," Vox sighs. "Human, if you've got it. Hell, animal would do just as well. It's a...gift for someone who lacks your discriminating palate."